Finally, a scientific study that confirms what frequent fliers have known for almost seven months: Travel stress stems largely from the “hurry up and wait” problems related to airline security, or at least what the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) claims is airline security.

In studying some 1,900 domestic and international travelers post 9/11, University of Washington doctoral student Jonathan Bricker found that the percentage of those who said they were stressed by commercial air travel skyrocketed from 60% just prior to 9/11 to a fulsome 81% in January and February 2002.

Not surprising. The reason they’re stressed should rock the folks who run the TSA. Less than 2% of fliers said their stress was generated from concerns about terrorism. “Travelers’ current primary preoccupation with their own safety is accompanied by an annoyance with a host of hassles associated with increased security procedures,” says Bricker.

In short, fliers are mad as hell with having to show up early, stand in interminable lines and then subject themselves to intrusive, inconsistent security searches.

Sound familiar? On a recent series of flights through Alabama, Texas and New York I, like you, both witnessed and was subjected to the incessant stupidity that still pervades the system. Consider this:

•       When departing Birmingham for Houston Hobby, a nice, little old lady I’d been talking to was arbitrarily plucked out of line, wanded, patted down, left shoeless and ordered to empty the contents of her purse. On her way to visit her grandchildren, she took it all in good grace.
  
•       Upon departure from Houston Hobby to Dallas Love Field, a Southwest Airlines captain was all but strip searched by a gaggle of burger flippers. He had to take off his belt, his boots, and was subsequently wanded and patted down. Incredulous, I turned to the person running the checkpoint and reminded him that all the pilot had to do to dump an airplane is simply flick his wrist. The newly-minted government employee was not amused.
  
•       On boarding a flight from Dallas/Fort Worth to Newark, I set off the magnetometer with some loose change in my pocket. A polite screener asked my permission to touch my belt buckle so it could be wanded. No problem. But, contrast the nice treatment at DFW with the yank and grab tactics at Newark when I boarded a return flight to Birmingham. The screener, in barely comprehensible English (TSA is supposed to have fixed that.) reached for my belt buckle and unclasped it — without warning. My instinct was to knock the guy’s hand away, but I thought better of it and stood there stoically while being patted and probed in an uncomfortable manner. Then I went to the Continental Presidents Club and had a couple of drinks.

It’s not that the people who run TSA should loosen up and have a couple of drinks. In the current climate, the TSA is entrusted with something approaching a sacred mission ensuring there are no future 9/11’s. Nor do fliers even want them to develop a sense of humor. We just want them to think. Thinking is something that was apparently not part of the plan at Sacramento recently when L. Lynne Kiesling, a senior lecturer in the Department of Economics at Northwestern University, tried to board a flight home.

Here’s an excerpt of a letter from Ms. Kiesling to John W. Magaw, Under Secretary of Transportation for Transportation Security, the person who runs TSA:

“I passed through the security barrier at Sacramento International Airport on my way home to Chicago after a business trip. I removed my laptop computer from my bag, placed both on the conveyor and proceeded through the metal detector. Having forgotten that I had 95 cents change in my pants pocket, I removed the change and went through the metal detector a second (and a third) time without a single beep. Nonetheless, the security officials (following a FAA policy) insisted that I be hand wanded. Because both my husband and I have had several instances in the past months of people walking away with our computers, I retrieved my bag and computer on my way to the wanding area. I informed the security agent I thought this policy was ridiculous, and asked to speak to the security manager…They informed me in no uncertain terms that I could speak with a manager, and that they were simply following FAA policy, and that not only did I have to be hand wanded, but that my bag and computer had to be re-screened because I had retrieved them. Again, I informed them that I considered this to be one of the most ridiculous of the ‘security’ measures implemented, while standing there with my arms outstretched waiting to be wanded. At that point, an aggressive deputy…of the Sacramento County Sheriff’s Department walked over to me and confronted me, having decided for himself that I must be a security threat. He thrust his face in front of mine and said, with an incredibly confrontational tone, ‘Are you okay to fly?’ At first, I did not understand what he meant, but he continued to berate me in an extremely aggressive and belligerent posture, stating that if I was ‘willing to make such a scene in front of so many witnesses’ that I clearly was not in a fit mental state to step on a plane. He then repeatedly threatened me with his power to go to Southwest and tell them not to let me on the plane, asking me ‘do you want to get home tonight?’”

Ms. Kiesling ended her letter by writing, “I travel extensively for work, but this is the final straw. I will go out of my way to avoid ever having to step on a plane again, to the extent that is humanly possible, and I am not alone.”

Indeed, she’s not. As more and more fliers like Ms. Kiesling stay home (telecommuting, driving, or crawling to their destination) the recovery of the US airline industry is left turning in the wind. Kiesling and fellow fliers are precisely the high-yield passengers that carriers must have to keep operating.

So, what are the airlines, and most importantly the TSA , doing to render the skies both safe and sane? We’ll let you know in our next report on April 24. Stay tuned.

There are eight million stories in the Naked City. Got a head-scratching security tale you’d like to share? E-mail us at ffeditor@oag.com.